Making Love

Sexual relations can foster union and harmony if a couple is kind to
each other throughout the day and also learns some simple love-making
techniques to create peace and satisfaction in their sex life.
We can think of sexual relations as a balancing of the male and female
energies. The most satisfying lovemaking does not end in sexual
explosion. It ends in peace. For this kind of balance and peace to
arise, time is required. If intercourse lasts at least half an hour,
with deep, gentle penetration, a couple will cultivate love and peace
together. Unfortunately it can be difficult for a man to delay
ejaculation for the length of time required to reach this state of
loving surrender. Unfulfilling sexual encounters will create tension,
even anger, in a once loving relationship. Tantric and Taoist texts
recommend that a man strengthen his prostate through exercise. A
stronger prostate will allow the man to delay, or even avoid,
ejaculation. The resulting longer intercourse will allow the balancing
of energies, fostering peace and love in the relationship.
The prostate is a few inches back from the anus. When a man tightens
and relaxes his anus, he automatically massages and strengthens his
prostate. (This is called Kegel’s exercise.) A man can do this exercise
at any time, day, or night, to strengthen his prostate. He can also do
the exercise during sexual relations. During sexual relations the
exercise causes increased circulation to the prostate, which causes the
prostate to partially empty semen into the man’s own blood stream. The
partial emptying of the prostate takes away the urgency to ejaculate,
and allows intercourse to continue. The exercise can be repeated every
so often during intercourse as long as the couple desires to continue
relations. If a man wishes to avoid ejaculation completely, he can do
so without harm if he does Kegel’s exercise after intercourse, which
empties the prostate into the blood stream and eliminates the erection.
In this way his lovemaking is more harmonious and his physical and
emotional energy are conserved. For More information on this topic, see
The Tao of Sexology, by Dr. Stephen Chang.

Important: Even if a man learns to avoid ejaculation, pregnancy is
possible. The man’s arousal fluid, called Cowper’s fluid, contains
sperm. Cowper’s fluid leaks out of the penis during sexual arousal. In
addition, seminal fluid, containing millions of sperm, may leak out of
the penis during sexual arousal but before ejaculation. For these
reasons, pregnancy is possible with no ejaculation. Even with no
penetration, the microscopic sperm can swim in the woman’s fertile-type
mucus, into her vagina and up to her fallopian tubes. Therefore, during
the fertile time, pregnancy is possible with only genital contact
(touching of the penis near the vagina.)

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